Actual Customer Review From a Man on Amazon UK After Using Veet Hair Removal Cream for Men After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. (Sounds kind of gay to me.) Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit if a treat. I ordered it well in advance and working in the North Sea I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types. Oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait. At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two vegetables. Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid off and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the drawer for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open, trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me. This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh! Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in, it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status, so to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect! https://imgflip.com/i/8q0hs3

#Pennsylvania – #Dog treats embedded with fishhooks found along trail near Lehigh Gap Nature Center https://www.wfmz.com/news/weekday-newsletter-headlines/69-news-at-5-00---dog-treats-embedded-with-fishhooks-found-along-trail/article_1cf53af7-771f-57a3-ad7a-40d19edeff5a.html

Ever wondered what happened to Amy Fisher, the teen who almost killed her boyfriend Joey Buttofucco's wife? Well, she did her time, got released, got married, had kids, made a porno (yes, it's still out there, and yes the dark cat found it. And no, you need to find it yourself). Now, she got UGLY. She's only a little older than I am, and in the leaked film, she looks like she's 80. But it's her. Time never treats the wicked well. Remember that folks.

Only Dead Fish Go with the flow. Today's liberal college students are too stupid to understand this. They are incapable of any original thought. https://imgflip.com/i/8pbuak

I've never seen a fish do that. Sometimes he will even try to bite your hand if you stop petting him. The person who works here doesn't know why he does this, but I have to admit, he's very adorable. https://files.catbox.moe/p6ehto.mp4

What song plays when you enter the room? I'll answer first. " Creed Fisher- Crazy (Official Visualizer)" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYQj4YxwSpY A lot of my life long friends will agree. God Bless America, God Save The Republic.

·÷±‡± HISTORY ±‡±÷· Captain Edwin "Bill" Fisher, 377th Fighter Squadron stands on the noseof his P47D Thunderbolt "Shirley Jane III" in Normandy, 1944. He would be credited with 7 kills and 3 V-1 flying bombs. He was killed in a training accident at Andrews Field, Maryland on the 28th March 1947

🎬 Goosefishes, sometimes called anglers or monkfishes OnPoint Animal Movie® ©All rights are reserved & belong to their respective owners. ─────☠───── https://pomf2.lain.la/f/q06759p.mp4

College Liberals: Hypocrisy on Display A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be very liberal, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth. She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch conservative, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his. One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father. He responded by asking how she was doing in school. Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying. Her father listened and then asked, "How is your friend Audrey doing?" She replied, "Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus; college for her is a blast. She's always invited to all the parties and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over." Her father asked his daughter, "Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0. That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA." The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, "That's a crazy idea, how would that be fair! I've worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!" The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, "Welcome to the conservative side of the fence." If you ever wondered what side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test! If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one. If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed. If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone. If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him. If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down. If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church. A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and Jesus silenced. If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his. If a conservative reads this, he'll repost it or share it. A liberal will delete it because he's "offended." https://imgflip.com/i/8o4vys

We Ought To Be Fishing 2 https://web.sermonaudio.com/sermons/42624131852828